The Amish have their own pron! Who knew? The books are selling crazy numbers in the US (13 million and counting) and the story-lines all involve Amish ladies meeting non-Amish males, getting funny feelings ‘down there’ and maybe even holding hands. Hot!
Charlie Sheen is kraaaazy and has written a piece where he imagines what it would be like to interview President Obama and TOTALLY NAIL HIM on how 9/11 was a conspiracy between the lizard people, the Tiran Corporation and the reverse vampires. Read the madness at
prisonplanet.com.
Hugh Hefner has filed for divorce. Apparently he had an ancient (47-years-old!) bunny on the side that he was, you know, kinda still married to. She’s been given several million dollars and $20 thousand a month to go away and be old somewhere else.
Disney bought
Marvel Comics for a lazy $4 billion this week. Expect to see more of the five thousand (yes, seriously) characters in the Marvel vaults getting their own movie adaptations and licensing deals. Someone might also print an actual comic book, maybe, if they feel like it. Oh, and Warner are buying DC Comics just as fast they possible can.
Ellen DeGeneres is the new host of American Idol. She replaces
Paul Abdul, who had to be pensioned off after her pill popping, *drinkie, drinkie*, exploits became a little too public.
Steve Jobs made an appearance at Apple’s iPod Event this week and a bunch of design nerds busted a nut in excitement. If you want to read endlessly speculation about his health/weight/appearance, the internet is waiting for you.
Khloe Kardashian is still the ugly one. Kim, meanwhile, is taking photos of herself in lingerie and Tweeting them.
The all new
Melrose Place premiered in the US this week. We haven’t watched it – probably never will, but we figured it’s worth a mention. If you don’t know, OG Melrose was famous in the mid-90s for having an openly gay character (that never spoke) and being retarded.
Lindsay Lohan has put on some weight and is no longer crazy. Alternatively, she’s lost weight and is more crazy. Depends on which tabloid you pick up. Also, Lilo’s got herself some vampire teeth and is desperately trying to get a role in Twilight. Or something.
American football star Shawne Merriman had to choke his girlfriend,
Tila Tequila, to stop her drink driving. He was subsequently arrested by cops. Tequila has not won much sympathy from the US press over all this because, well, you can probably figure that out for yourself. Let’s just say her reality TV show exploits haven’t endeared her to middle America. Teenage boys, that’s another story.
The Moscow News released a new print ad talking up their English credentials. “Things hard to explain, in a language you understand.” Anyway, the featured image has outraged some New Yorkers who think any reference to 9/11 is a personal insult. Check the images to make up your own mind. We think it’s pretty incredible (in a good way).
Rambo IV has Sylvester Stallone squaring off against some sort of giant sasquatch thing. It’s like they’re not even trying anymore.
According to new research,
Facebook makes you smarter.
Twitter makes you dumber. Make of that what you will... Oh, and while on the topic, the cast of the upcoming Facebook movie continues to be fleshed out. It’s now rumoured/confirmed that Justin Timberlake is playing the part of Napster’s Sean Parker. We’re still not going to pay money to see a movie about Facebook.
Oh yeah, this cat? Fricken AWESOME.
Last week's trashbaggery.
