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The week in trashbaggery volume forty-eight

20 AUG 2010 | Posted By: -Mikolai-

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The week in trashbaggery volume forty-eight

Christina Ricci
 
Elvis
 
Erykah Badu
 
Hilary Duff
 
Joaquin Phoenix
 
Justin Bieber
 
Ligers
 
Maru
 
Michael Douglas
 
Miley Cyrus
17-year-old Miley Cyrus wants to get breast implants. Daddy Billy Ray: Totally cool with it.

Jay-Z is the richest dude in hip hop for the second year running. He made a lazy $68 million last financial year.

Miranda Kerr is carrying a child in her belly. Fact.

Google’s Chrome OS tablet will be out in November. So now you know.

17-Year-old Taylor Momsen (from GG) was interviewed by Spin magazine. The story was littered with wonderfully ridiculous quotes. The best? "Music keeps me young.” We also like that she described her look as “high-class hooker” and called out Rihanna for being a popstar who dares to wear a “fuckin’ leather jacket”.

You know things are getting weird when there’s a trailer for a TV commercial. Yeah-hah. Gucci are launching a new fragrance called Guilt and they’ve got Frank Miller directing the commercial. Here’s the preview:



Need a new job? Word round the campfire is Mark Zuckerberg’s ‘email ghostwriter’ has quit. We’re assuming he’s on the lookout for a replacement since he’s obviously too rich to write his own emails.

Paris Hilton is giving up her party lifestyle to join the family business and become a hotel person, or something. "I've pretty much done all you can do," she explained, before describing her job credentials as “growing up in hotels". (Soz to Fujiko-san for the Paris mention.)

The trailer for Joaquin Phoenix's descent into madness movie has surfaced. You can watch it here. Either Joaquin is the greatest actor of his generation or his BFF/director Casey Affleck is pure evil.


Erykah Badu
has paid a $500 fine for getting naked in the street for her 'Window Seat' video she did earlier in the year. The song was great so here it is again.


Turns out the guy responsible for keeping Steve Jobs App Store pr0n free has a thing for following escorts and pornstars on Twitter. Guess you gotta know the product if you’re going to protect us from it.

OK magazine want to give Lindsay Lohan one million clams to talk to them when she gets out of rehab. It will be the biggest pay cheque she’s received in years.

Heidi Montag’s plastic surgeon, Dr. Frank Ryan, was allegedly texting her when he drove his car off a cliff and died. There’s a lesson somewhere in all that.

For some unexplained reason Tila Tequila was booked to play the annual shit fight that is Juggalo Fest (aka the Insane Clown Posse festival). She ‘got them out’, the crowd pelted her with shit, the whole thing turned into a huge fiasco. Method Man was also booked to play. The crowd also threw shit at him. Turns out fat white kids from the mid-west will attack anyone that wonders on stage.

"If the world wouldn't persecute me, I'd take nude pictures every day of the week," says Halle Berry. Sorry, what?

Yo dawg, I heard you like skate videos...


And here’s something a little newer, but not nearly as entertaining:

North Korea has an official Twitter account. And it’s just as bat shit crazy as you’d hope. Basically it’s just a stream of Tweets calling South Korea “whores". How very.

Michael Douglas has been diagnosed with throat cancer. He’s being treated and is expected to make a full recovery.

Justin Bieber is having social networking warz! He tweeted the number of his arch nemesis earlier this week, pretended it was his own and invited fans to “call me". 25 thousand tweens did, leaving 15-year-old Kevin Kristopik with a huge phone bill – he’s demanding an apology. Meanwhile, we’d like an apology for that incredible dull ‘Justin Bieber slowed down’ thing that went around earlier in the week.

Oh yeah, Kayne West, Justin Bieber and Raekwon are collaborating on a track together. Not even sure where to begin with this one...

This week marks 33 years since Elvis bought the farm. In the immortal words of someone, you’re either a Beatles fan or an Elvis fan. Question is, which are you? Answers in the comments section please. (FYI, Team Elvis forever.)


Taiwan is a strange place. Aside from making those insane animated videos, they also make ligers – mutant tiger / lion combinations. Three ligers were born in a local zoo this week, two have survived. Plans are already underway for a five-assed monkey.

Mel Gibson 'accidentally' drove his Maserati into some rocks on the side of the road in Malibu. As you do when you’re stone cold sober and not the least bit crazy.

The world’s first 3D porn is coming. 3D Sex and Zen: Extreme Ecstasy is due out in May. Do. Not. Want. (Not in 3D, anyway.)

Neil Patrick Harris and his partner, David Burtka, are having twins (via surrogate moms). "David and I are expecting twins this fall. We're super excited/nervous/thrilled. Hoping the press can respect our privacy..." This is a good excuse to run clips from Harold and Kumar, so here you go:

Hilary Duff and her NHL hockey player (who is also heir to the Post-It note fortune), Mike Comrie, got married this week.

Katy Perry gate-crashed some high school formal in Melbourne this week and then went to a gay night. Hollywood Backstage says "many of the lesbians were very desperate" to kiss her, while all those actually present say she was treated like a lady. PS. Who employed the simpleton to report?


Christina Ricci says Robert Pattinson is an "awesome kisser".

“The third season of Mad Men is better than any book from the past 10 years.” So says Bret Easton Ellis who’s out here promoting his new book, Imperial Bedrooms, and looking for men to sex on Grindr.

Remember that Metallica documentary where they got all emo and talked about ‘their feelings’. This new Wu Tang documentary looks like the hip hop equivalent.

DMX has been released from an LA jail after serving 18 days of a 90-day sentence for crazy driving. Let’s see how long he can stay out of jail this time round.

And let’s finish up with some more Maru. He’s pretty much the best cat ever:
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Comments on this Post
There are "15" comment(s) on "The week in trashbaggery volume forty-eight"

Senior Member Em-T
Miley Cyrus: proof money can't buy you talent or credibility outside the tween market. It can, however, buy you silicone. Rank!
Em-T  -  about a year ago
Reply  |  Report
Respect Luke
Geoff Rowley's the king.
Luke  -  about a year ago
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New Lounger samuel
nar Elvis is
samuel  -  about a year ago
Reply  |  Report
Respect Jamie
No, Maru is.
Jamie  -  about a year ago
Reply  |  Report
Respect -Mikolai-
Fuck it, I'm voting Maru tomorrow. Gonna draw me a little cat picture, draw a box and tick the shit out of it.
-Mikolai-  -  about a year ago
Reply  |  Report
Respect NOTORIOUSJAY
Fuck it, I'm voting Wu-Tang tomorrow.
NOTORIOUSJAY  -  about a year ago
Senior Member Georgia
And here I was thinking that ligers only existed to Napolean. Oh, and I had spies at Grouse Party who said that Katy was RIPPING up the d-floor. She lasted longer than Ruby Rose, who piked at about 2.30am. My leso friends had little bitty heart attacks.
Georgia  -  about a year ago
Reply  |  Report
Senior Member Lebronski


Nah man, Ligers are real. And they're effen amazing. Actually breeding Ligers is cruel, but they're still rad to look at.
Lebronski  -  about a year ago
Respect freeak
No shit it's cruel. Who wants to get fucked by a lion if you're not a lion?
freeak  -  about a year ago
Respect -Mikolai-
Meanwhile, is the Elvis / Beatles divide an actual 'thing' or something I imagined? Does anyone care, have a preference? I used to be a Beatles man but these days I'm all about heart stopping sandwiches and shooting guns at TV sets.
-Mikolai-  -  about a year ago
Reply  |  Report
Respect freeak
Did you hear the theory that Elvis died of chronic constipation? I swear I read something like that a few weeks ago. His guts were rooted. Not surprising really.
freeak  -  about a year ago
Senior Member Lebronski
I was thinking more the fact that they suffer from gigantism and can't really run, jump or do lots of other liony/tigery type activities. But yeah the fucking thing is another good reason.
Lebronski  -  about a year ago
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Respect JiMBOB
I have Elvis tattooed on my hand... it's also my password... very handy... true story...
JiMBOB  -  about a year ago
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Senior Member Georgia
Since when is this Beatles/Elvis? Wasn't it always Beatles/Stones? I was always a Sam Cooke girl over Elvis either way.
Georgia  -  about a year ago
Reply  |  Report
Respect fujiko-san
The only thing better than Elvis that Maru cat.
fujiko-san  -  about a year ago
Reply  |  Report

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Well produced album, so there Yeezy - not all hate...
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Ummmmm I can't beat that story but I did once hold...
Em-T
 
2
Delicious serving of trash, KO.
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Thank you, I love your work, I just want to wrap i...
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Oh not steven seagal but steven siegel... still aw...
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Slap that bitch...
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Amazing! I'm so bummed I missed it. Photo #65 is a...
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