and ex-girlfriend Jessica Biel
are "quietly seeing each other again”. Alternatively, Justin Timberlake has been making out with Cameron Diaz. Or he's boning Mila Kunis. Or Britney Spears, again. Feel free to make up your own rumour… "Justin Timberlake spotted finger-banging Whoopi Goldberg
on a rollercoaster!" Too much? Sorry.
big plans to revive MySpace
(he bought part of the company last week) revolve around a talent contest. So yeah, expect some busted up Tila Tequilas, mid-west emo bands and southern rappers with tattoos on their faces. Should be a hoot!
If you’re a guy and trying to get laid then lying about ‘being into’ Adele
will improve your odds. But hurt your ears
is now worth seven billion dollars. Because of MAGIC! And because some tech people pumping the IP float say it is.
is a Tumblr dedicated to Beverly Hills 90210
. You’ll like it. In the meantime, here’s David Silver (aka mister Megan Fox
) busting some next levels raps while the cast line-dances.
has named her one-month old kid Alef or Aleph. In case you’re wondering, it’s the first letter of the Hebrew alphabet.
According to a new study, fatty foods give your brain a “drug-like feeling
" similar to marijuana. This chemical reaction has you craving more food, and then you become a big fatty. Scientists are hoping to use this discovery to create drugs in the treatment of obesity – rather than doing something fun, like cheeseburgers that get you stoned.
celebrated her 25th birthday this week. She went out to a restaurant in Malibu with friends, where she spent the night eating cigarettes, drinking Red Bull and texting people. (Probably.)
DJ Pauly D
has been sued by a DJ Paulie for copyright infringement. The unknown ‘Paulie’ wants four milli for his troubles.
Meanwhile, want to watch a video of an insanely drunk Snooki
dry-humping a pot plant? Sure you do
If you enjoyed RAED’s
heartfelt tribute to Schapelle Corby
you gotta watch this short documentary about Australia’s greatest rapper. (Yes, we are aware it's from a while back.)
Overseas call centre workers
like you about as much as you like them (ie: not very much). According to internal briefs, “Australia is known as the dumbest continent” where everyone is drunk and technologically backwards. Americans, on the other hand, “Do the most stupid things, impulsive things.” Also, they shout a lot. So there you go. Everyone hates everyone
is "taking a year off from work to enjoy herself." Read: having sex with new boyfriend Justin Theroux.
Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg
is the most popular person on Google’s new social media platform. He has 29 thousand followers, or fans, or whatever measurement they’re using. Either way, it’s double what Google’s founders could muster. It also say a lot about the sort of people currently chilling on Google+.
have won. Transformers 3
opened at #1 in US cinemas last week, taking $116 million at the box office.
new album, 4
, has debuted at #1 in the US charts. She celebrated by gate-crashing some kids doing a ‘choreographed’ routine to her new single. Unfortunately, the kids were kinda crap and just sort of shuffling around so we didn’t get to see B do the running man in death defying heels
. Still, it’s nice of her to show up unannounced and freak people out.
are gross. And not just when you’re doing body shots (who are you people?). Scientists did scientific stuff to people’s belly buttons and found they’re bacteria-filled pits of filth. Not only that, they’re creating mutant cocktails of germs. “In 662 cases, the microbes could not even be classified to a family, which strongly suggests that they are new to science.” You’ve been warned.
won the annual 4th of July hot dog eating contest in the US. He consumed 69 hotdogs in ten minutes. Then he died. (No, that’s a joke. He’s fine.) The secret to his success is a technique that involves separating the bun from the sausage, dipping the bun in water to moisten it and then forcing both down his throat. Yeah, let’s think about that for a minute.
has been axed after 25 years on air. You’re just going to have to find something else to watch on Saturday morning while huffing bulbs and recovering from the BEST NIGHT EVA. And speaking of best night ever, here’s some classic footage of Faustina 'Fuzzy' Agolley
a little worse for wear during an interview.
Someone hacked the @FoxNewsPolitics
Twitter this week and claimed President Obama
had been assassinated. Regular Fox viewers were disappointed to learn it was a hoax.
Oh look, Shia LaBeouf
is opening his mouth and saying stuff again. This week it’s Hilary Duff
being made to feel special thanks to that patented LaBeouf charm and, “probably the worst date either of us has ever had". He didn’t go into more detail so feel free to make up wildly outrageous scenarios.
is telling anyone who will listen that he had an alcohol ‘problem’ when he was 18-years-old. Um, who didn’t? If you’re not throwing up and having regrettable ‘hook ups’ you’re not doing it right. Yes?
is back with a new album/single. Although to be honest it’s more like a Justin Timberlake
single. But hey, almost naked ladies, so what do you care…
PETA have named Russell Brand
and Kristen Wiig
the Sexiest Vegetarian Celebrities of 2011. Which is sort of like winning the beauty pageant at a [insert terrible comment here] show.
Remember Pete Doherty
? Yeah him, well he’s been released from prison after serving six weeks of a six month sentence for drug possession. Meanwhile, over the in US, Gucci Mane
is also free from prison and was last seen throwing money at some Atlanta strippers.
And finally, have you ever felt like you couldn’t keep your eyes open another minute?