Courtney Stodden has an "ethnic" (first she seems Spanish and then French and then Puerto Rican and then Zsa Zsa Gabor) alter-ego called Courtina because Courtney Stodden has access to the internet.
Mazel!
Wiz Khalifa and
Amber Rose had their baby! It's a boy and they called him Sebastian.
Last week we got really excited that
RiRi and
Chris Brown had broken up – again – but this week she Instagrammed a photo of them together and also they've been seen hanging out at the beach together. You can see it all in the gallery, but we advise you focus on Rihanna's mesh-clad butt instead of Chris Brown's ANYTHING. It's just too depressing.
Guys,
Drake got denied entry to a club because
Chris Brown was inside. The world is topsy turvy.
Fergie Ferg and her hubby
Josh Duhamel are having a baby. She gets 10000000000 points for hashtagging her announcement #mylovelybabybump.
Some idiot fired
Khloe Kardashian from hosting the X Factor. In the immortal words of Tupac: you 'bout to feel the wrath of a menace.
Good news:
Kim Kardashian is looking after the The Chosen One (obviously), "I used to always say I can’t wait to get pregnant because I will just eat whatever I want, but it’s completely different. I’m like, OK, I want to eat as healthy as possible. Though lately I’ve been watching shows like I’m
Pregnant and Addicted to Meth. It definitely makes me feel better if I’m wanting one sip of Diet Coke or, you know, too much sugar. I’m like, 'This woman is on meth.'" OH WE LOVE YOU KIM.
Rob Kardashian got fat. (See the gallery. If you want.)
Also in
RK news: remember when he went on a Twitter rampage when he thought
Rita Ora cheated on him? It featured on Kim and Kourtney Take Miami
and Dry Hump It Until It Sobs and they give him really smart advice. Basically: "SHUDDUP ROB YOU'RE EMBARRASSING US AND MOM WILL DISOWN YOU IF YOU DON'T LOSE SOME WEIGHT AND SELL SOME VODKA OR AT LEAST BECOME A CELEBRITY DJ UGHHHHHH"
John Mayer gave
Katy Perry an ugly love-heart ring for Valentine's Day and probably Crabs too.
Scott Baio, aka Chachi Arcola aka Bob Loblaw, tweeted a photo of himself in the tub, covered in suds. It was weird. (Please feel free to re-read that last sentence in Ron Howard's voice.)
Speaking of
Arrested Development,
Kristen Wiig has signed on to play a young Lucille Bluth. So this bodes very well.
Oh god.
Heidi Montag and
Spencer Pratt are still around, AND THEY HAVE GUNS. The two desperados went on some British TV program to show off their gun collection. The only thing more frightening than these two owning a bunch of weapons is how dead inside Heidi is. (But mostly LOL at how they think they need guns because they have "crazed fans and stalkers" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA OH YOU GUYS.)
Denzel Washington might be racist: "For whatever reason, I never befriended any white actors." OK mate.
Diane Lane and
Josh Brolin are getting divorced. Never knew they were married. Oops?
Rev Run says that
Beysus Christ has "put-pimped" husband
Jay-Z. Run says "she captured the ultimate pimp...She out-pimped him. She’s so smart and feminine, that she was smart enough to name the new upcoming tour Mrs. Carter... She gon' keep his ego in check." Whatever, Reverend.
Guys, did you know
Ja Rule was in jail? For 21 months? For gun charges? No? Well, he's been released now.