MUSIC. A fickle component of wooing that will either assist in getting you lucky, or render you the most revolting and undesirable person on earth (also see: alcohol).
We want to help you out Loungers, so we've put together a list of jams you should NOT have on your iTunes playlist when that special someone comes around, unless you're trying to get rid of a non-babe quick smart. We've provided the building blocks, now you do the rest.
"Break your Neck" – Busta Rhymes *
Um, no thanks.
*great song though.
"All That She Wants"– Ace of Base
Apparently this song is about a women in Denmark who would use men as 'stud bulls' (not our phrasing) to get pregnant, and therefore collect welfare payments. Unless your mood is a baby-making mood, this thought would surely kill it.
"Age Ain't Nothing But a Number" – Aaliyah
SHE WAS 14 WHEN THIS SONG WAS RECORDED. R KELLY PRODUCED IT. SO MANY THINGS WRONG, CAN'T COMPUTE.
"Father Figure"– George Micheal
"I will be your father figure (Very happy). I have had enough of crime (Please let me). I will be the one who loves you - 'Til the end of time."
"The Bad Touch"– The Bloodhound Gang
Are you 14? Is this 1999? No. Just because the album cover had two zebras doing it doesn't mean it will get you laid.
"You Ought to Know"– Alanis Morissette
"Hey baby! Let's get it on, and then I'll stalk your new girlfriend when we break up, and tell everyone I went down on you in a theatre! LOLOLOLOL!"
"Girl, You'll Be a Woman Soon"– Urge Overkill/ Neil Diamond
YOU SHOULD BE A WOMAN NOW, AGH.
"... Baby One More Time"– Britney Spears
This is how your/their thought process would go: Britney in a school uniform > weird song > what does it mean? > domestic violence? > Chris Brown > mood killed.
"Killing In The Name Of"– Rage Against the Machine
Anyone who puts Rage Against the Machine on when they're getting down is a serial killer. Fact.
"Shaddap Your Face" – Joe Dolce
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