If you're organising a romantic Valentine's Day dinner with oysters and candles and Chris De Burgh and a teddy bear holding a love-heart and a glass of pink champers with a diamond ring in it, you should probably stop reading now.
If not, welcome. You're amongst friends.
Here are a few anti-Valentine songs for your aural pleasure. Feel free to break out the gin.
The Cruel Sea 'The Honeymoon is Over':
Nancy Sinatra 'These Boots Were Made for Walking':
Jay-Z '99 Problems':
Ben Folds Five 'Song for the Dumped':
The Dandy Warhols 'We Used to be Friends':
Kelis 'Caught Out There':
The Rapture 'No Sex For Ben':
Annie 'Chewing Gum':
No Doubt 'Sunday Morning':
The Misfits 'Die, Die, My Darling':
Ugly Kid Joe 'I Hate Everything About You':
Lily Allen 'Not Big':
And the crème de la crème, Erykah Badu 'Tyrone':