Hip Hop Tourists! Have you gotten over the fucking harrowing experience that was South African hip hop
? It left us a bit depressed too. So as we sunk our fortieth tinnie of the weekend, we wiped the dry vomit off our chin and thought "Which country knows how to party?".
PACK YOUR BAGS FOR IRELAND
Ireland is a country with an alcohol drenched, blood splattered history. They seem all "LOLOLOLOL, Guinness!" now, but in the past they've starved to death by the millions, killed each other over religion and nationality, and even now struggle with a growing multicultural population. AND BOI DO THEY LIKE THEIR RAP MUSIK.
Now we know what you're thinking. Irish hip hop probably tries to escape from the national stereotype, right? To show that the next generation don't wear tweed waistcoats, sing old depressing songs and play "twiddly-dee" pan flutes. LUCKILY, YOU'RE WRONG!
'Twas the year 1993, and the English had only stopped being scared of being blown up by the IRA in the last 10 years. A band called Marxman
, made up of two Irish guys and two British Jamaicans, made the hip hop.
Here they are with "Ship Ahoy" featuring Sinead O'Conno
r and a bunch of pan flutes. What can we even say about this?
Marxman weren't so thrilled about the British troop presence in Northern Ireland. "Sad Affair" seems like a pretty tame song, but it was banned by the BBC and a bunch of other U.K radio stations. That's 1994 for ya!
toured with the Beastie Boys
and Public Enemy
! And U2
(less exciting)! We don't know what "Howld yer Whist" means, but "ROCK ON, SIOBHAN!" is a pretty good catch phrase.
"We're going to do some damage, so go running to your mammies". Classic.
This song uses fart sound affects and sounds like Cypress Hill
would if they were portly, white European dudes.
M Xtreme The Nonpareil
raps about prostitutes. But not in a "I LUV DEM STRIPPERS" 2 Chainz
kind of way.
Messiah J and The Experts
put on American accents. NOT COOL YOU GUYS, BE PROUD OF THE ROLLING GREEN FIELDS OF YOUR BIRTH! They're kind of interesting though.
t has the worst rapper name ever. That's all.
seems like he should be really bad. But that's something adorable about him? Are you allowed to call rappers adorable?
Is it racist to say that Rob Kelly looks like Action Bronson
? THE END!