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The Fashist Manifesto - volume twenty-nine

17 DEC 2011 | Posted By: Em-T

The Fashist Manifesto - volume twenty-nine

Abbey Lee for Portmans
Abbey Lee for Portmans
Andrej Pejic of Swedish department store Hema... modellling a push-up bra
Andrej Pejic of Swedish department store Hema... modellling a push-up bra
Chanel's $20 facial wipes
DKNY's $1 million perfume
Elizabeth Taylor's jewel auction
Gavin Bond shoots Andrej Pejic
Gavin Bond shoots Nicola FormichettiForma
Kate Moss for Fred jewellery
This week Abbey Lee Kershaw's latest campaign for Portman's has debuted. It's very un-NSFW and she sadly looks like a Photoshopped Barbie doll.

Another very internationally successful Aussie model, Andrej Pejic, is modelling push-up bras for a kinda dowdy Swedish department store called Hema. This is kind of odd seeing as he doesn't have boobs.

Pejic has also made The Guardian's list of influential gay people for 2011 as shot by UK photographer Gavin Bond. It's pretty awesome and includes other fashion names like Gareth Pugh, Nicola Formichetti, Marios Schwab and Jonathan Saunders.

Sarah Murdoch has "resigned" from her role as the host of Australia's Next Top Model in order to pursue being really disgustingly filthy rich. Let us all remember Sarah as the most famously fashionable forehead-slapper in Australian TV history.

Following the announcement, another blonde model, Jennifer Hawkins, was approached to replace Murdoch on ANTM. Her publicist has been quickly quoted saying she's turned down the role... presumably because she can't really talk and stuff (we're onto you, J-Hawks). This whole saga then naturally led to the tabloid media scraping at the bottom of the possible-ANTM-host-barrel. They've now settled upon Liz Hurley as a likely candidate. God help us all.

Fashion brand DKNY has filled a huge gap in the market with "the world's first ever one million dollar perfume". The solid gold bottle is adorned with 2,700 diamonds and weighs 15.17 carats. For all we know it smells like cat's piss, but luckily the proceeds will go to the charity Action Against Hunger.

Surf, Dive 'n' Ski and Jetty Surf are giving Golden Tickets to five lucky global surf enthusiasts that buy boardies at their stores (they come in a pizza box if that's any incentive). Anyways, here's a clip of the best girly surfing movie EVER to justify plugging that promotion. 

Kate Moss had topped the list of a Fashion Intern Horror story compiled by a site called Fashionista. Apparently the British model just wanted to accessorise her white pants suit with a little yellow wee patch. 

In between marking her territory, Moss has also modelled her own jewellery collection for a French label called Fred. (Side note: that is the least sounding French label we have ever heard.) She is, naturally, naked in the campaign and the jewels are pricey (ie: $50 thousand for something called a "scarf necklace"). 

Iconic '90s label Azzedine Alaïa is putting on a retrospective at the Groninger Museum in The Netherlands, with the exhibition highlight being rooms devoted to different fabrics like velvet, fur and black leather. Just in case you don't know: Alaïa is, like, a totally important designer.

(Apologies for that truly tragic video which is obviously trying to avoid copyright. You get the gist.)

But maybe you don't feel like going to Europe to see an exhibition about some designer? If so, then Valentino is also doing a museum retrospective... online. The virtual museum tour can be downloaded from his site and comes with a new breed of music we like to call Jacuzzi Opera.

This tee-shirt is going viral this week. We don't get it, but apparently it has something to do with the Sydney hipster wars or something. 

A slightly more reputable fashion designer, Marc Jacobs, has unveiled his Christmas campaign. It's "a sugarplum fairy" dancing whilst spruiking a $24 umbrella. Naturally.

Models have sad times too. Jennifer Hawkins' Coogee mansion was passed in last weekend on the highest bid of $2.5 million. For all you rich house hunters reading: it's now relisted with a $2.6 million price-tag. Design features include an ensuite, dressing room, and something called a "Japanese agape spoon bath".

Another supermodel, Twiggy, has said in a recent interview that her tendency to practically bathe in moisturiser is key to attaining that youthful 62-year-old skin. She also discussed world politics and stuff.

Elizabeth Taylor's jewels have broken an auction record – set by the Duchess of Windsor in 1987 – after selling for $116 million at Christie's on Tuesday. The highest price was for a $12 million pear-shaped jewel that we can only presume is the real life version of Rose's black diamond thing in Titanic. Hope the new owners have insurance like Billy Zane did...

(You listen to your friend Billy Zane.)

Still in auction land, a Hermes Birkin made famous by Sex and the City has smashed another world record by selling for $200,493. The crocodile skin tote is from the Exceptional Collection, which we guess it kinda would want to be for that price.

So exactly what would you "do" for a designer handbag like that croc Hermes? Sex? Maybe a quick wristy behind the bleachers? Wear your price out in the open with these cute totes by a label called Maude & Tilda. Our fave is "Will Fuck For Chanel".

So even models don't have good enough bodies to model these days. Swedish fashion chain H&M has admitted to using computer generated mannequins – with a real woman's Photoshopped face – to sell lingerie and swimwear online. They've defended the technique by saying a fake body better displays their clothes than a real one, i.e. they need a need better pattern maker pronto.

Nike is fuelling rumours of a collaboration with Kanye via the @AirMag twitter account. Um, whatever, here's some more Victoria's Secret/Yeezy stuff.

UK "newspaper" The Daily Mail is doing one of those Who Wore It Better comparisons between a Victoria's Secret model called Maryna Linchuk and Lindsay Lohan. We don't have all the answers just yet, but it is notably newsworthy that LiLo is wearing clothes.

Also flippant with the panties: somebody called Sofia Vergara. She "forgot" to wear them whilst being captured by the UK paper in a pair of sheer leggings.

And finally, Chanel has started selling packets of facial wipes for $20 a packet. Their outer coatings are made from "delicate, handpicked Egyptian cotton", just in case that helps your purchasing decision for any last minute Xmas presents. 
Alexandra Louise Champion Hackett makes her own fashion
Volley collaborate with Simon Miller
Style tips with Gwen Stefani
Animal skull CT scans 3D-printed into jewellery
Underated does biblical fresco fashion
MBFWA are giving away tickets to the Weekend Edition
Air New Zealand x Sports Illustrated
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