Jet- lagged, make- up free and ‘bedraggled’ looking Kelly Osbourne tweeted a pic of herself pre- bed in a newly bought low- cut pyjama top. SHUT THE FRONT DOOR, she doesn’t wear make- up to bed?!! Even though she looked like death warmed up in this photo, kudos to Kel for having the self- confidence, after shedding a shitload of weight, to post such a horrendo photo. Let’s be honest, if that pic featured on Fashion Police with a black line over her eyes, it would be a unanimous, ‘Streetwalker’!
Ahh, Justin Bieber, my hatred for you continues to grow. Exponentially. The
douchebag Biebs just keeps walking into glass doors. He has done it THREE times already! Much to my delight, I must admit. It’s gotta be that uber annoying fringe slash bowl cut hair-do he was totin’. He was completely pre- occupied with flicking it out of his girly, doe- like eyes like an obsessive compulsive, only to be hit, BOOM in the face with a thick pane of glass. He has since started to style his hair upwards to avoid any more severe cranial injuries concussions. It won’t affect his musical ability, obviously. What a re-tard.
P.S Are we all on to this yet? http://lesbianswholooklikejustinbieber.tumblr.com/
There is such a thing as a FACEBOOK SHOWER CURTAIN. Sorry, a ‘SOCIAL’ shower curtain. Whatevs. Gone are the days of the fashionable ‘world map’ or ‘Nemo’ curtains. It’s just so witty and clever. You can have your location as, ‘the bathroom’ & be in a relationship with ‘lime scale’, along with a
conceited ego boost overly zealous profile pic. Who doesn’t love that?....... Normal fucking people, that’s who.
Did anyone else see Madonna try and get her kit off awkwardly and flash a black lace G (from behind) at her concert in Rome? No? Sorry for showing you this then.
Lindsay Lohan is
partying her arse off super dooper tired after filming her Elizabeth Taylor flick, ‘Liz & Dick’. So exhausted in fact she crashed her Porsche into an 18- wheeler, has allegedly been linked to some porn star in a new film called ‘The Canyons’ (too many connotations to note) and was found unconscious in her hotel room. Pretty sure Liz Taylor would want to slap that slurry in the face for trying to outdo her, living or dead. And for not looking anything like her, especially in a leopard swimsuit.
Emma Stone is one seriously trendy lady. She also has an alleged new beau, Spiderman usurper, Andrew Garfield. Super cute couple, super sweet taste in threads. Love it. (Just quietly though, he is totes batting above his weight. Something about a pompous brow that annoys the crap out of me).
J.Lo has seriously thought through an outfit choice that consists of sheer, crystals and her arse as the main focal point. Oh, and a bedazzled cane was thrown in too. Super stylin’ there, Jennifer. It’s been over a decade since ‘Waiting for Tonight’ was released. Please do not try and re-create that masterpiece of a video clip. The use of a pink bra and green strobe lights will live in my memory forever.
Eva Longoria was at the 52nd Annual Monte Carlo TV Awards in a pretty pastel number, as well as a Marchesa gown, that was far too frou frou for such a petite lady. Anyhoo, she should however, win an award for the most awkward photo opp ever - sitting in the lap of a giant gold statue. WTF?
Yep, Matthew McConaughey has tied the knot with Brazilian Camila Alves. The story behind her dress is very sentimental. Something about rosary beads, praying around the dress and having it designed by some elderly Brazilian family friend. Either way, I'm not a fan of the dress, but they are such a sizzling couple, that quite frankly they could both be wrapped in banana leaves or loin cloths and still look ah-maze.
Super babe Miranda Kerr is officially the highest paid model on the planet. Any excuse to show another Victoria's Secret clip never hurt anyone.
And finally, James Marsden is still hot. He showcased his abs-olutely sculptured bod whilst powering through waves in Hawaii. He was there for the Maui Film Festival. Eh, who cares, it’s just nice to know a 40 year old actor can still look buff without being creepy and eye-lined to within an inch of his life, like Tom Cruise in Rock of Ages.