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Fashist Manifesto - volume seventy two

31 OCT 2012 | Posted By: SineadStubbins

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Fashist Manifesto - volume seventy two

Courtney loves clothes
 
Dame Judi Dench
 
Gwen and Katy
 
Heidi
 
Heidi and Seal
 
Jessica Biel
 
Jourdan Dunn
 
Karland Kanye
 
Kate Upton
 
Kim Kardashian
Kim Kardashian was a mermaid for a Halloween party, and apparently her wig cost $2000. GOOD AFTERNOON EVERYONE HOPE YOUR DAY AT YOUR JOB WHERE YOU HAVE TO WORK FOR MONEY IS GREAT! 

Everybody knows that Heidi Klum and Seal always win Halloween :'( :'( and I think we can all agree that anticipation surrounding Heidi's solo costume this year has been pretty stressful. It turns out she is just like us regular folk, as it seems she’s going down the dark path every single gal inevitably follows at some point in her life: the sexy costume . Albeit an elaborate Cleopatra situation. 

It’s not something we’re proud of, and it’s likely we’ll wake up with fake eyelashes on our tits clutching only an empty bottle of Vodka to warm the other side of the bed, but gurlfriend, no shame. We've all been there. You can always outfit repeat the Gandi/ape/human anatomy costume another time.

**BREAKING NEWS** Hurricane Sandy has forced Heidi to cancel her infamous Halloween party. Stay safe everybody! 

Empty bottle of vodka…askew fake eyelashes…oh yeah! Courtney Love’s new clothing line Never The Bride will apparently be stocked on Net-A-Porter. I wonder if they will include the fact that each dress comes with a ruby embossed with the word “cunt” in the item details. They are generally very thorough. (Don't know if I am allowed to say that on the internets but you guys don't mind right?) 

Speaking of people who probably use that word more often that socially acceptable (I feel u), Naomi Campbell has a fucking huge house. Just thought you should know.

Like nipples? Cool. You’ll probably like Sigred Agren’s cover for Numero. Generally I am in favour of naked titty, but these ones won’t stop looking at me. I feel weird. 

Speaking of titty, now we are going to talk about Kate Upton. Guys, she’s the November cover girl for Vogue Italia. REAALLLLY? I definitely thought porn would be the most logical and lucrative next step in her career. 

The trailer for The Carrie Diaries is 2.40 minutes of your life that you can never get back. Just for the record, I do not endorse the viewing of this if you value your happiness/sanity, there's not even any slutty college Samantha or young feminist Miranda. I’ll probably still watch this show because I am a sucka and I enjoy complaining. I am such a Carrie guys!
 

Here is a photo of Karl Lagerfeld and Kanye West. Apparently they are collaborating. I am trying to keep my emotions out of this because I am in public right now and I don’t think it’s appropriate to start weeping. THERE ARE SO MANY REASONS THIS IS A GREAT IDEA (almost none of them relate to the actual clothes they would produce).

In equally capital letter-worthy news, OMG DID YOU GUYS SEE JESSICA BIEL’S WEDDING DRESS?? It definitely looks like something I’d like to put in a glass tumbler, stick a spoon in and eat with a generous serving of summer berries. I’m hungry.

Remember those photos that Orlando Bloom took of Miranda? Yeah, I’m sorry for reminding you. This time British model Jourdan Dunn gets handy with a camera for Rag & Bone’s DIY Project. Ugh, could take it or leave it. Definitely does not warrant capital letters. 

I am so prepared to roll my eyes every time fashun peeps make a video where they dress up small children, but apparently my unnerving lack of maternal instinct is slowly softening, because I actually lolled at this one from The Coveteur. CuuUUUuuutttTTTTeeeEE! 

Opening Ceremony did a lookbook for spring 2013. You already know how to feel about this (correct response is :-O  !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!). 

Rob Kardashian did socks for no reason at all. You already know how to feel about this (correct response is =_= ............). 

You might have thought you liked yourself, but after seeing the gallery picture of Gwen Stefani and Katy Perry at the CFDA/Vogue Fashion Fund show in LA, you will realise you were wrong.  

Here's something that will make you feel better! Dame Judi Dench is 77 years old and wore '007' neck bling to the 50th Bond anniversary celebrations. SIK BITCH. 

Today I learnt how to make plunger coffee from a Youtube video. Thought this would be more interesting/useful than the news that Kate Middleton has been voted Britain’s Most Naturally Beautiful Woman. Here are the plunger coffee instructions.
 

You're welcome. 

THE END.
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Comments on this Post
There are "2" comment(s) on "Fashist Manifesto - volume seventy two"

Senior Member SineadStubbins
That Carrie trailer is actually the fucking worst.
SineadStubbins  -  about a year ago
Reply  |  Report
Senior Member sallytabart
SJP must be rolling over in her grave
sallytabart  -  about a year ago
Reply  |  Report

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