It’s been lurking around at the murkiest parts of the internet for a few years now, but according to Italian designer
Emilio Cavallini, obscure not-quite-trend, men’s hosiery – or mantyhose – has risen in the past year. Thanks for sharing the burden of women’s “whole mess of problems”, bros!
Sadly, the modeling industry is not ready for this jelly. “This jelly” being the combined forces of two soccer/Spice spawn.
Brooklyn Beckham isn’t following his brother Romeo – the face of Burberry – into modeling. Instead he’s going to train with Chelsea to become a football player or something. What a waste of a jawline and hereditary body image concerns.
Kate Upton, AKA our generation’s
Marilyn Monroe (YOU CAN FIGHT IT ALL YOU WANT BUT IT IS HAPPENING AND IT IS HOT), has booked a sweet new campaign for Sam Edelman shoes. Apparently they chose to ditch
Charlotte Kemp Muhl for Upton Girl after seeing paparazzi shots of her in a pair of Edelman boots. I can’t wait until those pictures of me WERKING a pair of opaque black tights from Target gets me a similar deal.
Also this week, Mercedes-Benz released a new commercial featuring Kate twirling her hair and watching a football team soaping down a car. It was a snooze and had nothing on THIS.
You’re welcome.
At the SAG awards earlier this week, Jennifer Lawrence wore a navy strapless Dior gown. She won an award and when she got on stage people thought the dress had ripped but then we all learned that it didn’t rip. That is the story of Jennifer Lawrence’s SAG awards dress. #fashun
A public service announcement that the Black Mental Health Alliance of Massachusetts is running in the Boston area is threatening young men who don’t hike up their trousers with a three-year prison sentence. Meaning that “baggy pants” is now the #1 worst response to the question, “What are you in for?”
Carla Delevigne was one of Karl Lagerfeld’s weirdo corpse brides in the Chanel couture show in Paris. This is relevant to me because she may or may not be back in the role of teen-girls’-soul-sucker AKA it’s rumoured she and Harry Styles are dating again. If only Harry had sung this to her and d8ed me instead.
Speaking of Harry (because when am I not, RIGHT GUYS!?), Stephen Colbert fell under the spell of fashion ingénue/editor already more successful than you’ll ever be/teen witch Tavi Gevinson on his show last week when she convinced him to dress as the One Direction lady killer, drawing inspiration from the band’s Wonderland magazine cover shoot.
Tavi: There were some really great photos of the members of One Direction modelling puppies, so I feel like if you carried around a puppy and had boy band hair, you would be set.
Steven Colbert: That would be a good look?
Tavi: Yeah!
Steven Colbert: For a 48-year-old pear-shaped man? Excellent.
In the wake of lip-synch-gate 2013,
Beyoncé Instagrammed a picture of herself at a rehearsal for her Super Bowl halftime show wearing a sweatshirt saying “Can I Live?” People are saying it’s a #fashion #response to her inauguration drams, but I dunno you guys, I think gurl’s just werking a kewt sweatuh.
In writhing news,
Victoria’s Secret models (they’re only called Angels when they’re wearing those Michael wings, right?) Candice Swanepoel, Lindsay Ellingson, Barbara Palvin, Lais Ribeiro, Sara Sampaio, Karlie Kloss, Erin Heatherton and Behati Prinsloo did lip-synching to a crappy
Maroon 5 song and got thrown zero shade. Once again, the world is unfair to Beyonce (JK that never happens, she is our ruler).