When
B-Rock Obama got sworn in for his second and final term as prezzie this week, the only things we cared about were
1)
Beyonce’s hair
2) What
Joe Biden would think of Beyonce’s hair
3) What the ladies on Capitol Hill would be wearing. Obvi.
Michelle wore
Thom Browne (and her new bangs AKA fringe, unless you live in America/Stoneybrook, Connecticut),
Malia and
Sasha wore
Kate Spade and
J. Crew (age appropz) and Bey wore
Pucci and
Dior.
Katy Perry, surprisingly, was both invited to attend and dressed like a fashun glamazon in
Rodarte. Forget what was on her bod and her arm (
John Mayer) for a sec to look at the tiny version of
Aretha Franklin’s now-legendary inauguration 2009 hat she carried with her!!!
You know what’s coming.
In a display of pretty poor taste,
Vogue published a spread “celebrating” Hurricane Sandy’s first responders. Apparently the way to honour the people who helped the Residents of New York and New Jersey recover from a storm that left them without food, electricity, heating, wayer, wi-fi, transport, et al in infinitum, was to make them re-create their efforts while
Karlie Kloss wears
Oscar de la Renta near them and
Annie Leibovitz takes pictures of it. If I were these workers, I’d have told Anna and Grace to let ME wear the dresses and get MY fuckin’ hair done and be BFFs with
Naomi Campbell.
Oscar de la Renta is also believed to be in cahoots with
Anna Wintour to give
John Galliano a helping hand to get back amongst the fashion fold. You know what would really help his cause? Not telling people with cameras that Hitler was an A+ guy! Just a thought.
Across the pond,
British Vogue has released some sketches of the costumes
Miuccia Prada designed for her BFF
Baz Luhrman’s
The Great Gatsby. The costumes are basically a “best of” collection of Miuccia’s best pieces for
Prada and
Miu Miu. No shade here; Miuch (as Baz calls her) can do no wrong by me. Ignoring this mess, obvi.
Last week,
Jimmy Fallon invited former wallflower of US Vogue
Grace Coddington onto his talk show to promote her new book. In short, he went batshit crazy trying to impress her and it was adorbs. Watch this clip to see the best gift anyone has ever been given.
Nigel Barker, the photographer whose name we only know because he’s judged 17 seasons of America’s Next Top Model, says that being on the show caused Vogue to pull him from their roster of photographers. I guess encouraging this woman to behave like herself is a turn-off for them?
Adam Levine and
Nicki Minaj signed on to design clothing and accessories lines for Kmart. Separately, we hope. The world is not ready for pastel pink leather wrist cuffs co-designed by pop stars who “judge” two separate television singing competitions.
This week, while being interviewed for the Fashion Icons series at the 92Y in New York, 70-year old
Betsey Johnson cartwheeled and giggled and did the splits and tore her clothes off amongst conversations about her company going bankrupt last year. She told host Fern Mallis and the (probs) super confused crowd, “When I was growing up there were no initials. Now I’ve been told that I have the ADD and the XYZ and whatever.”
“The ADD.” Oh, Betsey. Let us take you back to the soda shoppe to play jacks.
Finally, super super supermodel
Karlie Kloss has announced plans to add “nerd burger” to her growing CV. The 20-year old plans to go to Harvard “at some point”. Not just any college, mind you; Harvard. You know, the one that denied Paris Gellar a place. She wants to study either business or medicine. You know, those similar fields with very vague and non-specific career endpoints. Wanna know who put these ideas in her head? Karlie’s quick to point the finger: “Tyra [Banks] did it. She went to Harvard business school. I can do it, too.”
Sure, follow this woman blindly into a 6-year degree.